A comment on my last post from a reader got me thinking about fear; that four letter word that few want to talk about. So I decided to talk about it.
Fear is one of those things that we are ready to admit to having if it is a socially accepted fear, such as a fear of spiders or growing old. A real, potentially life-threatening fear, such as having your house broken into, or coming face to face with a bear on a secluded trail is also OK to discuss.
But those kinds of fear, which may be life-impacting in their own way, are not the fears I am talking about. I’m talking about the little insidious fears we all have, that we may not even know we have. For example, fear of buying something you really like because you are worried your friends might laugh so you think “it’s not me”. Fear of doing something you really want to do because your friends or family will think you’re crazy. What about limiting yourself at work because you’re worried your coworkers would accuse you of brown-nosing. There is always going to be someone who is critical of your choices. But it shouldn’t be you.
How to Deal
Recognize fear when it comes. Examine its roots. Is it your fear or did you inherit it? Greet it out loud and then dismiss it. It is not welcome. You must act immediately though or it will seep into your mind where it will carry on never-ending conversations with the voices in your head. Then you are done for!
Fear does nothing positive. Again, I’m talking about the manufactured social fears, not the fear that is healthy and may keep you from physical harm. So try doing something you are afraid of. Put yourself into the universe.
But those kinds of fear, which may be life-impacting in their own way, are not the fears I am talking about. I’m talking about the little insidious fears we all have, that we may not even know we have. For example, fear of buying something you really like because you are worried your friends might laugh so you think “it’s not me”. Fear of doing something you really want to do because your friends or family will think you’re crazy. What about limiting yourself at work because you’re worried your coworkers would accuse you of brown-nosing. There is always going to be someone who is critical of your choices. But it shouldn’t be you.
How to Deal
Recognize fear when it comes. Examine its roots. Is it your fear or did you inherit it? Greet it out loud and then dismiss it. It is not welcome. You must act immediately though or it will seep into your mind where it will carry on never-ending conversations with the voices in your head. Then you are done for!
Fear does nothing positive. Again, I’m talking about the manufactured social fears, not the fear that is healthy and may keep you from physical harm. So try doing something you are afraid of. Put yourself into the universe.
Here’s the thing. You have to task a risk. And barring any very unfortunate accidents and illegal activity, no one is going to die, especially you. Let this be a call to find your inner courage to be the you who you already be. Fear is a choice. Don’t choose it.
Getting rid of your fears not only makes you more authentic, it makes you more confident, and nothing is as sexy as confidence!
Getting rid of your fears not only makes you more authentic, it makes you more confident, and nothing is as sexy as confidence!
